Sunday, 10 February 2013

Appa and Facebook

Having Appa on your Facebook list could be one of the most disturbing things ever. He would upload all your childhood photos, including the awkward ones taken during the kindergarten prayer sessions when you had to wear a fluffy yellow dress and wore that horrible shade of pink color lipstick and had a mix of chocolate smears around your mouth. Worst of all, the front-tooth missing pictures he had uploaded would have gotten the maximum likes and comments. “Look at my daughter’s pink ribbon and her rippling long hair” would be the album’s title. Shabba!

He would write “My daughter has just won the music competition at her college, I am so happy about it” on your wall for the whole world to see. And being an arduous Facebooker, it took me a while to understand that a lot of people were deriving amusement from those statuses.

He would also update all stuff you have been doing on his profile. His friends would ask “Music competition huh? Still the classical geek…isn’t? And man, Subhakee hasn’t even changed one bit!” He would upload ‘My daughter’s first sari day’ and you may get queries about your friends as well. “Andha paiyyan epdi? He doesn’t sound nice. Was he your schoolmate? How often do you talk to him? Yedhuku un photos ku 150 likes? Adhuvum pasanga vera 'like' pannirkaanga?"

You would be reminded in a few consecutive phone calls to send that photo of yours writing notes in class which you showed to your Appa long back in some infectious enthusiasm. And finally, outta desperation, when you mail it personally, it would appear on his profile, the next day, “How industrious! Isn’t she a cutie?”

Also, when you are online, Appa from his workplace would send this on chat, "Hi Kanna, I would be late. So, inform Amma not to cook anything for me". And you would immediately go offline. And needless to say about these game requests like – Farmville and Shitville!

The crowning glory is the online publishing of your family birthdays, anniversaries and even the other ‘special days’ with the cake marks on your face, including those moments when you had your mouth wide open to gobble down that big well rolled mound of rice.

And every day, there will be fresh filter philosophy posted for the benefit of the world at large. You were hearing it all these years, now you get to read online. So, if you guys wanna introduce your Appa or Amma to FB, think twice! But jokes apart, these kinda experiences are cute and funny.